HEY LADIES!!! If you want to enjoy a hot night on the town while looking like a slut ...... but you don't want the fear of being raped while walking alone through a dark abandoned alleyway!!!
Well, then I've got the product for you!!!
[caption id="attachment_577" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="The rapex condom"]
[/caption]Can we say fillet? Maybe hamburger?
That's what the guys tallywhacker is going to look like after he pokes his pesky manhood into your private area. Why? Because you are using the new RAPEX anti-rape female condom. It hooks onto an attacker's penis and aims to cut one of the highest rates of sexual assault in the world!!!! What could be better that that??!!! IN THE WORLD!!!!
[caption id="attachment_578" align="alignnone" width="280" caption="and she looks like such a nice lady till you try to give it to her forcefully"]
[/caption]Now when you leave the house daddy won't be able to say, "you're not leaving my home dressed like a whore!!!". Just flash daddy a big smile and hold up your RAPEX device for him to see. Then he will know that you're safely protected by a BARBED WIRE SNATCH!!!!
[caption id="attachment_580" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="a little something like this"]
[/caption]* okay, Billy Mays mode OFF *
"Nothing has ever been done to help a woman so that she does not get raped and I thought it was high time," Sonette Ehlers, 57, said of the "RAPEX," a device worn like a tampon that has sparked controversy in Africa (a country used to daily reports of violent crime)
Ehlers said the "rapex" hooks onto the rapist's skin, allowing the victim time to escape and helping to identify perpetrators.
"He will obviously be too pre-occupied at this stage," she told reporters in Kleinmond, a small holiday village about 100km (60 miles) east of Cape Town. "I promise you he is going to be too sore. He will go straight to hospital."
You can't see me but I'm wincing in pain. That's sounds unbearable. Little hooked barbs tearing into my Mr. Snuffleupagus. Uh, FRIKKIN' NO!!!
[caption id="attachment_592" align="alignnone" width="206" caption="My Mr. Snuffleupagus"]
[/caption]Reminds me of some of those crazy torture devices the Catholics came up with during the inquisition. Ah, those were the days. Forcing people to their will. I get all misty eyed just thinking about it.
[caption id="attachment_594" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="this also went in a vagina or an ass or whatever hole was sinful - the PEAR OF ANGUISH"]
[/caption]Now that I've got all of you cringing with thoughts of PRIVATE PART PAIN it is time for me to say goodbye. And remember - ONE PERSON'S PAIN IS ANOTHER PERSON'S PLEASURE.
Brian of Euphonic Dissonance signing off.
